September 27, 2021

My head is in a spin
My feet don’t touch the ground
Because you’re near to me
My head goes round and round
My knees are shakin’ baby
My heart it beats like a drum

It feels like I’m in love…

Kelly Marie 

And, how do you know when you are in Love? When you feel in Love? 

Last month, I went to France for my brother’s wedding. He asked me to officiate the ceremony and of course, I said Yes! 

I love Love. 

I was already registered with the Life Church Ministry after a “Joey” joke with one of my besties in 2017. As a result, I married her with a very good friend of mine.  And after that one, I had the pleasure to marry another couple of friends. 

So, yes as a woman with two divorces under my belt, it’s pretty ironic! But the truth is, I do not regret anything. It took me a while to make peace with my love life.  

At a very young age, I thought I was going to marry in my early 20’s (which I did, but it did not last!) and have three children, a big dog, and live happily ever after. This vision of Love I had at a young age was a source of many arguments with my mother who urged me to financially never depend on a man and focus on being independent. 

At the time, I didn’t understand that she was talking to herself. She had, and still has a brilliant career, but was also married very young and had me at 24.  Her mother, my grandmother, was so concerned about her daughter’s future marriage that my mother just followed the path and had to discover herself through her marriage. 

I discovered myself through my divorces and my absolute love for passionate relationships. What can I say? I love to be loved. I love the feeling of Love. I love being in a relationship. 

Honestly, there is no better feeling than being in a healthy relationship, growing together, healing together, and sharing your life together.  Sure, you know that it won’t be easy every single day, but to still give your best to make a relationship last forever, is for me the most beautiful declaration. 

The beginning is often the best part of Love. Fireworks, magnets, rebellion, and the attraction. The onset signals a wide-open expanse of possibility. 

Split a burger with someone when you are falling in love, and you can die happily knowing this was your last meal. Play the perfect song on the jukebox and dance with someone you have known your whole life, though you met minutes ago. 

Inherently we fear an ending. Maybe that’s why we stop right after the end of the beginning.  The routine, the compromise, the deeper work or just the fear of the unknown is too much to endure. The fear of having our heart broken. The fear of losing that person that feels like home. 

But what if we chose not to fear but instead, to Love?

As it takes courage to be happy, it also takes a lot of courage to be in Love. 

How many times in my practice, the first issue is about Love. We are all trying to get the magic recipe, understanding our behaviors, fears, and the attraction to toxic people. 

Love is as much desired as feared. 

It’s a feeling that can make us feel the world is ours and in a second, it can make us feel that it is the end of the world. 

Be broken hearted… As we can live for Love, we can also die for it.

A newborn can be fed and taken care of, but without Love they may not survive. 

You can be the richest person in the entire world but without Love, it’s meaningless. 

You can be the most beautiful woman in the world, but without someone holding you tight every night, that beauty does not mean anything. 

Love is what makes life magical. 

In Family Constellations, we can see that all of us are looking for a reconciliation with Love. Because, you can enter the field by telling me “I hate my parents.” but in the next 10 minutes, you will be crying a river begging your parents to give you the attention that you did not have as a young child. 

Remember, hate is not the opposite of Love, it’s indifference. 

Remember as well, that the most epic Love stories are those which transcend expectation. 

So, do not get too attached to your ideal partner list because most of the time, you are just going to attract the opposite of what you thought was a perfect match for you. 

Be opened to meeting that person that will surprise you, that will make you forget about that do list because guess what, Love is not written.

Love is made to be experienced. 

Embrace it. 

This is Love. 

Marine Sélénée