February 28, 2022

There is what we want. 

There is what our journey will bring to us.

There is our stubbornness to not want what our journey has in store for us. 

Here will begin the fight of our life. A fight that we will keep losing. A fight that will slowly but surely dig our own grave. We will end up drained, exhausted and so resentful about this life. Resentful that what we imagined for ourselves was not achieved. Holding on to that one imagined way, that it never occurred to us, we were part of a much bigger plan and refused to sign up for it.  

Is it serious? 

Not really, as I do think we are all here to love our own experience. Sometimes the teaching is a bit too much for us so we just keep hitting rock bottom. I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. However, as a human being, normally our purpose is to learn from our mistakes and finally surrender to the reality of our life. Literally dropping to our knees, crying even and having that final relief of “I surrender!” At this moment, it feels like a little death. The truth is, it is finally the first day of the rest of our life. 

You finally stop drinking. 

You finally stop excusing your violent partner. 

You finally stop sabotaging all of your efforts. 

You finally stop spending all of your money.

You finally stop selling your body. 

You finally stop mutilating yourself. 

You finally stop binging. 

You finally stop vomiting. 

You finally understand that if you keep going on this road, you are going to lose yourself. And, again sometimes that’s how you have to alter your life to bring a collective conscious to the other ones. But sometimes you can also change the story. You decide and admit that the fucking journey you were on is not at all fulfilling. That you just want to rest and finally smile for the important things. The things that you cannot buy or consume. The things that you can just feel deeply within yourself. The things that make you feel alive. 

In Family Constellations, most of the time we enter the field with a lot of expectations. Yet every time, the field shows you in a beautiful and simple way that you can stop fighting. You can stop being on guard. The reality that you were so afraid of seeing and feeling is actually so much smoother than where you are stuck. 

So, let’s go back to this moment where we are on our knees (literally or metaphorically). Where it hurts so much inside that we cannot do anything else. We can choose between life or death and we finally choose life. It’s shy, ambivalent, but there is this softness of knowing that as of now, you are just going to follow your path and not question it anymore. 

When we stop questioning it, as crazy as it seems, things start unfolding exactly as we wanted them to be. I swear! You won’t feel drained anymore, you are just here in the moment, enjoying it or sometimes not. But you just know that it’s bigger than you and that you do not need to do the hard work on your own. 

Acceptance and respect. Again, accepting that sometimes the life that you wish you could have, and that you planned at each age, is not at all the one that was yours. You know what? Maybe it’s actually even better than you imagined. Maybe right now, you don’t believe me but let’s have a deal. Let’s believe in it for each other, for the next three months. Let’s send prayers and words of encouragement. Find your person who needs you at this moment, who is on her / his knees and offer a helping hand to them.

And YOU, grab the hand. 

Grab your chance. 

Marine Sélénée